Undressed Under Duress, Part II   Hard Times

In the 1971 novel, "Hard Times & Arnie Smith" by Spur-Award Winning author, Clifton Adams, a lanky 21 year old cowhand inherits a country store in Texas from his recently deceased uncle. His good fortune was cause to celebrate. Arnie Smith was gonna be rich! He headed for the "Royal Gentleman's Bathhouse and Tonsorial Parlor" for a shave and hot bath. He sent the hot-water boy with five dollars to go to the dry goods store and "fetch me a new pair of California pants, a plain hickory shirt, and a union suit." After finishing his bath and dressing in his new clothes, it was off to the nearest saloon. 

After a night of drinking way too much and fighting not hard enough, Arnie had blown most of the little money he had. He ended up spending the night in the Dodge City jail and waking up with a hangover. He spent his remaining funds paying his way out of jail and for the damage his fisticuffs had caused the saloon. 

Finally, Arnie could think about heading towards Smith, Texas to claim his inheritance. First though, the cowhand returned the horse he had been lent to the rancher he had hired on with. He then had to sell his saddle, bridle, gun and holster so as to afford the trip south. Using those meager funds, he traveled by train until his money ran out. Then he began walking toward his destination. By a stroke of luck, he was offered a ride with a farmer and his son in an old, rickety wagon.

As the threesome traversed the Chickasaw Nation through Oklahoma, Arnie noticed something peculiar. The man and boy continually glanced sideways at him with eyes that didn't quite look right. Their hungry look made his skin crawl.  Before long the farmer turned off of the main road, stopping the wagon. The old man grabbed a broken wagon wheel spoke while his boy took hold of an ax handle. The miscreants meant to rob him of what few possessions he had. They set upon Arnie hitting him hard enough to drive him to his knees. Crack went the axe handle on the back of his skull, then blackness.

Sometime later, Arnie slowly regained consciousness and lay there for a long while on the bare ground just trying to get his bearings. He didn't know how long he had lain on the prairie unconscious. But he knew he was cold, very cold. In fact he was freezing and began to shiver. The young man slowly opened his eyes and discovered he was cold because he had been stripped and laid out in just his union suit. 

The plowboy strips the cowboy
of his pants, shirt and boots and
leaves him lying in his union suit

The farmers had stolen his boots and new clothes leaving him lying in the dirt in just his underwear. Arnie knew he had to get up and get going. “There was a limit to how long a man could lie on the prairie in nothing but his union suit.” 

The farm boy had discarded his own filthy clothes and old brogans when he had stripped Arnie of his shirt and pants. The thief's clothes were left laying in the dirt beside Arnie. Well, at least he would not have to plod to the nearest town in just his union suit. He pulled on the boy's disgusting clothes and made his way slowly to the next town to seek help. With no money, decent footwear or clean clothes, he had to figure a way to resume his sojourn south to Texas.

Presenting 
      Undressed Under Duress

A number of you who view my blogs have one thing in common. A vivid memory of an episode from the old 1957 to 1959 NBC television show, The Restless Gun. This western featured John Payne (1912-1989) as Vint Bonner, a theater and movie star whose career began in the 1930's. This series began on radio as The Six Shooter starring Jimmy Stewart,* It ran for one season before transitioning to television.

In “The Englishman,” Bonner finds himself ordered to undress at gun point down to his union suit and boots and forced to hike back to town and down main street in his long underwear. He is ridiculed by the gunmen who robbed and stripped him and again later by townsfolk who mocked him as “the underwear kid.”

Over the years many of you remember seeing this memorable scene as young boys. I must confess, I had not seen “The Englishman” until Stan, Joe, Rich and, most recently, Ron Payne in his posting, had brought it to my attention. As far as I know John Payne is not related to Ron Payne, guest contributor to this blog. See “A Thespian Union Suit Fan Growing Up” and “An Innocent Rube,” from November 14, 2019 in Union Suit Fan.

Back in the late 1960's and early 1970's, my dad and I enjoyed numerous westerns. It was a time I associated cowboys with union suits. Countless movies and television shows had them running around in their one-piece long underwear.

With so many of you mentioning the particular episode of The Restless Gun, I began thinking of other movie and television westerns as well as other mediums (theatre, books, comics) wherein the protagonist (and sometimes the antagonist) was forced to strip to his union suit. Remember Mortimer in the movie, They Call Me Trinity? So I decided to create a multi-part series about just that. And so, Undressed Under Duress was born. Hope you enjoy my picks over the next few weeks.... Chris

Part I The Restless Gun (October 31, 1957)

In the episode “The Englishman” Vint Bonner, a smart rambling and restless gunfighter, hooks up not only with an old prankster friend but with a journalist from the United Kingdom. But things aren't what they seem and poor Vint pays the price. Vint's old buddy plays the ultimate joke on him. The polite and proper Englishman turns out to be a scoundrel. Check out these scenes from that memorable episode.

Vint is tasked with taking a large sum of money from the town's mercantile to a safe bank in a nearby town. The Englishman asks to ride along so he might document a typical day in the life of a cowboy. Vint agrees to take him along.

 A mile or two out of town Vint is held up and robbed of not only the money but his clothes too. The “thieves” demand Vint strip to his union suit and require him to walk back to town in just his long underwear and boots. But not before one of the gunmen slaps his hat back on this head telling him "a man just don't look right without his hat." 

The men tag him with his new nickname, “The Underwear Kid.” 

Vint trudges back to town in his union suit.

At the edge of town, the folks can't help but notice a furious cowboy in his union suit determinedly walking back to the mercantile store where the tricksters and the Englishman have gathered. He is followed and ridiculed all along the way. A mother and daughter pass not believing their eyes upon seeing a man out in public in his underwear.

As he is explaining the robbery to the owner of the general store, the day takes an ominous turn. From his laugh, Vint realizes his old friend was in on the "robbery." Just a harmless practical joke.

Upon entering the mercantile, the Englishman soon shoots Vint's friend and the shop owner. He then makes Vint tie up the other men. 

Attempting to abscond with the money, the Englishman has plans for Vint and motions him back outside. 

 

But when the Englishman asks for a leg up on to his horse, fast thinking Vint spoils the escape by slapping the horse on the rump making him rear.

As the Englishman lies stunned on the ground Vint grabs the saddle bag full of money and the thief's gun. And off to jail they go. Similar to most westerns in the 1950's through the 1970's, everything works out well in the end. 

*Twenty two year old Jimmy Steward made his Broadway debut in George Abbott's and John Cecil Holm's “Three Men On A Horse.”  In a brief appearance at the end of Act II, the young actor ran on stage in a red union suit extolling a single line lost to history. By most accounts, Stewart “brought down the house” with that short appearance. As a result one of the most successful acting careers of all time was launched with him appearing on stage in a suit of long red underwear. 

Added February 7, 2020: MacHeath48 directed me to another episode, "The Sweet Sisters," in which Vint again is caught in his long underwear. This time getting out of bed one morning at a boarding house in his union suit:

See MacHeath48 in the comments section below. 

Thanks, pal... Chris  

Don't miss Part II of Undressed Under Duress coming soon!